Friendship

I've lived a lot of places in my life. I've worked at a lot of different jobs. I've played on a lot of teams. And consequently, I know a lot of people. I don't mean that arrogantly either. I have had the privilege of interacting with and getting to know a large number of very different people. There are old classmates, going back to my K-5 days and all the way through my one shining semester in grad school. There are old teammates from middle school, high school, AAU, college, and church league. There are people I was in 4-H with. There are people from each of my very different jobs, starting when I was ten years old. There are people from church. There are people from the gym. There are people who I know through my six siblings. There are people I just know through other people. Most of these people I would venture to classify as acquaintances of mine, in varying degrees of relationship. Some of them I haven't seen or talked to in years and some I may never talk to again. But there are a few, a select few that I would proudly call my friends. And an even smaller number who are my "kindred spirits", my +1's, the friends to whom my soul is forever tied.

"Friends come and friends go, but a true friend sticks by you like family." (Prov 18:24)

I was trying to think about what a true friend is and what characteristics they possess. These are the things I recognize in my true friends that I value, cherish, and am so thankful for. They're always there, no matter the circumstances. They "love at all times", even in the midst of conflict, adversity, and despair. They are the ones there to pick me up when I fall, encourage me when I falter, and praise me when I succeed. They understand the value of having my trust. They respect the choice I have made to confide in them and they protect that. They protect me. They prove themselves every day as worthy of my trust. They respect me. They put up with my craziness. They don't judge me in my weakness. They're quick to forgive. They listen.....a lot. They love me in spite of myself. They love me outside of themselves. They extend grace to me when I least deserve it. They are for me. They cheer me on, having no personal stake in my success. They accept who I am. They don't require me to prove anything. They do not look to me for validation or worth. They are the hands and feet of Jesus in my life. They confront me in candor and love. They encourage me in my walk with Christ. They speak Truth into my life.

I don't deserve to have any of these people in my life, but in His grace, God has blessed me with more than a few. I do not know where or what I would be without the true friends God has placed in my life. I only hope and pray that I can be that type of friend in return. I love you guys!

3.23.09

I wasn't sure where this phrase came from, but I felt the strongest urge to use it today.

"piss or get off the pot"

As it turns out, it's absolutely fitting for how I feel today.

"[Piss] or get off the pot" is a common English language colloquial expression, used to imply a person should follow up their stated intentions, with action. It is also used to urge someone to complete a task with a greater degree of efficiency or timeliness than is observed at the time the expression is used."

Like I said: fitting!

Naples

Three days spent in Naples, Florida doesn't hardly seem like enough. It was the first time I'd actually watched the sun set over the ocean and it was absolutley breathtaking every time. I didn't realize how much quicker sunset happens than sunrise. Once it gets to a certain point on the horizon line, that big ball of fire just seems to free fall suddenly. It really is amazing.

I spent three glorious days with my best friend from high school and her mom, in an 11th floor condo, on Vanderbilt Beach. We spent hours at the pool, took several long walks on the beach, ate the most glorious piece of grouper EVER, and caught up on the past several years. I'm so thankful that they dragged me along on this little vaca' and look forward to our trip next summer. Marco Island, anyone?

I always seem to get introspective after vacations, which I'm going to assume is completely normal. Anyway, we were sitting around the pool on Sunday morning and Kristin asked me what I was planning on doing for my birthday this year, which will by #29. I'm not really big on birthday celebrations, probably because I just don't like being the center of attention, but I'm well aware that I'm creepin' up on the big 3-0 and probably warrants some kind of celebration. I guess I'm just not in a hurry to admit that the years keep passing. I want so desperately for my life to move and I don't even care what direction it goes in. I just want some type of movement. But just like I reminded a dear friend last week, sometimes we're put in a position where waiting is the only option. Sometimes, God calls us to a task that creates a situation in which we have no other option but to let go. I guess I thought that the older I got the more control I would have, but as it turns out, the older I get the more I realize just how little control I actually do have.

just to keep me going

"God proves to be good....to the woman who diligently seeks.
It's a good thing to quietly hope, quietly hope for help from God.
It's a good thing when you're young to stick it out through the hard times."
(Lam. 3:25)

Just a reminder

I needed to be reminded this morning of a very simple, yet hugely comforting truth about my Jesus. Luckily, this song came on my ipod...

So faithful, so constant and so true

So powerful in all You do

You fill me, You see me

You know my every move

You love for me to sing to You

***

I know that You are for me, I know that You are for me

I know that You will never forsake me in my weakness

And I know that You have come now even if to write upon my heart

To remind me who You are

***

I'm amazed at how easy it is for me to think that God has no idea where I am in my life, or that He knows exactly where I am and has allowed me to get to this point only to make me miserable. I'm ashamed to admit that I think that sometimes, but it's true. So many times I question the way in which He is working in my life and think arrogantly that I could do so much better. I'm not sure why I would think I could do better, but for some reason I do.

***

We have been working our way through the book of Mark at church and there are two things that are continuously jumping out at me every week. One is that the things that I want are not necessarily the things that I need. It's hard to let go of things that I am convinced would be right for me, but I am learning to trust that my Father is taking care of me and that He is "for me" in every situation. The other thing I've been learning is that even though I constantly try to control and manipulate situations to get what I want, He simply waits for me to stop struggling and then steps back in and reminds me who He is. In His patience, He never gets frustrated with me. In His Love, He never gives up on me. In His grace, He never turns me loose.

***

He sees me.

He hears me.

He's for me.

And that's enough to get me through today.

Spring Break '09

Where: Vanderbilt Beach, Naples, Florida

When: March 19-22, 2009

What: Body Bronzing 101

Who: Yours Truly!!!! :)

beware

i started taking my medication, or "leptic pills" as they have been so aptly named by my best friend. i've been taking them consistently for four days, if four days can even be considered consistent. when the doctor handed me the samples and said, "these should help you stay awake throughout the day", i believed her. i really did. i was excited about feeling awake, but now i'm starting to believe she was full of it.

i slept eight hours last night. i even decided to tivo the bachelor so i could get an extra hour of sleep, which wasn't too difficult considering the crap jason mesnick pulled on monday night's three hour spectacle. i'm still upset about that. anyway, i decided that watching jason and molli discuss their relationship could wait. i wanted to make sure i was rested for today since it's gonna be a long one. so, i crawled in bed at ten o'clock and fell asleep shortly thereafter. sadly when i woke up this morning, i didn't feel a minute of it. it felt like i had just laid my head down. you know it's bad when everyone at work asks if you're okay and tells you how awful you look. today i'd have to agree with them. i look as tired as i feel. and i took my pill this morning. go figure!

but that's not the worst of it. i've been tired for months, maybe even years. that i can handle. it's miserable, but i can deal with it. the thing i can't handle is how these "leptic pills" are making me feel. my good friend, sara, is having a baby in june. she had a hormotional episode the other day where she basically felt like a stranger in her own body. now while i'm not pregnant and have nowhere near the hormones raging as she does - that's exactly how i feel. i don't feel like myself and i haven't for the past several days....four days, to be exact. at first i just thought it was the exhaustion that was making me feel this way, but after doing a little researching online - i'm blamin' the pills.

i blog about this only to warn those whom i interact with regularly.
i'll say it before i need to, "it's not me! it's the pills"